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Reading The Lines with Jonathan Ponniah: Golf and Ghouls

THE ROYAL & ANCIENT GAME CAN ALSO BE THE SCARY & CREEPY GAME

Have you ever been out on the golf course as twilight falls and get this funny feeling you’re being watched?

No, I’m not talking about your golf buddies eyeing each move you make while taking a drop, looking intently for even that slightest infringement as one full day of wagering comes down to the last shot on the last hole.

I’m talking about that feeling that sends a shiver up your spine and makes the hair on the back of your neck pop up (and no, I’m NOT talking about the US presidential debates either!).

I certainly have. Thankfully, I’ve not seen any apparitions (yet), but that odd, somebody’s-watching-me feeling has probably struck me a dozen times or so … and a few of those occasions were out on the golf course.

The most hair-raising incident, literally, happened in the mid-1990s on a now defunct golf course, Pandanusa Golf Club on the fabled island of Pulau Besar off the coast of Melaka. Malaccans like me know and respect the history and myths of the island, along with its many taboos; suffice to say it’s not a place you’d want to get stuck at after dark.

I was there with a couple of golfing buddies and we were rushing through our afternoon game so we could catch the last boat back to the mainland. Walking to the last teebox before the others, I teed my ball up, did the usual waggle and made my backswing.

At the top of my swing, I swear I felt something holding my club back and figured it was one of my mates who had snuck up to prank me. I was about to swivel and poke him in the ribs (well, the target was actually slightly lower down) when two buggies came up the track.

It was my friends … both of them.

I turned around immediately to look at what was impeding my driver … there was nothing and no one there, just trees, leaves rustling in a sudden breeze.

I picked my ball up, ran to my friends and said: “Let’s get the heck out of here, it’s getting dark and the boat leaves soon”. They took one look at my spooked face and nodded quickly in agreement.

On the boat ride back, despite clear weather all day, a storm kicked up and made it a thoroughly unpleasant experience. One of the taboos for visitors to Pulau Besar is to abstain from consuming pork at least a day before setting foot on the island, lest risk treacherous weather on the short trip back to Umbai jetty. Perhaps one of us had. Or perhaps it was just our plain bad luck.

Sometimes, Pulau Besar comes into view during flights to and from Singapore and, on a clear day, you can still make out the outlines of the Pandanusa course despite Mother Nature’s best efforts to take back what had been taken away. It still gives me goosebumps.

The graves of Old Tom Morris and Young Tom Morris

Another golf-related spooky incident, though actually not on the links, was at St Andrews a decade ago when I was there for the 150th Anniversary Open Championship.

One of the must-do sub-pilgrimages while on a pilgrimage to the Home of Golf is to visit the graves of Scottish golf icons, Old Tom Morris and his son Young Tom Morris, which lie against the eastern wall of the ruins of the 12th century St Andrews Cathedral.

I walked there on my own, just before dusk, eager to get some photos of the famous ruins and gravesites. It was still light when I got there but, while walking past the imposing fame of the main cathedral and a sea of tombstones, a fog drifted in.

Within seconds, I could hardly see beyond 10 feet and that ‘somebody’s-watching-me’ feeling popped up ominously. Needless to say, I hightailed it out of there, making a quick mental note on the way back to the hotel to ensure my next visit was in broad daylight.

The gist of all this is that golf, being the ancient game it is and the nature of the grounds on which it is played, is intrinsically tied to nature and, by logical extension, the supernatural. It’s something that we golfers live with and should embrace, regardless of whether or not we believe in ghosts and goblins.

So, as Halloween approaches, let’s celebrate all that’s ghoulish in golf … and may the spirit of Old Tom Morris help you find all errant golf balls and tip those cup-circling putts in!


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